Ear Lavages, VGA (VideoGamers Anonymous), Swinger Dates and other such nonsense.

Well I know that posting updates on ones life is a cheap cop-out, but I'm going to do it anyways because hopefully it will jump start my writing car, which has broken down recently.

Topic 1. Ear Lavages
What the hell is that you might ask? Well its what doctors do when you your ear wax, oh excuse me cerumen misbehaves. Unlike normal ear wax, which is supposed to trap particles, dry up and fall out of the ear, my cerumen likes to get stuck in there (either because I sleep on one side too much, or I have a bent ear canal). It waits around till I clumsily get water stuck in there, then swells up so that I can't ear much of anything, creating pressure and headaches. Anyways the result is going to the Urgent Care Clinic for an ear lavage. First they squirt some good old hydrogen-peroxide in there, which sounds like someone pouring a can of coca-cola in the canal, then you wait around for it to fizz away. Then they come back and using a squirt syringe that has a long tube at the end, they force the blockage out. This part sounds like a washing machine in your head. If its loose enough it will come out and plop into the little tuperware you hold under your head. It tickles like no other, can create a strange dizzy feeling. Either way, now I'm a pro at holding the tupperware to prevent spillage.

Topic 2. VGA (Videogamers Anonymous)
Jordan quit WoW, sold his account for $1000 to some Canadian. Luckily my account renewal was up around the same time, so we're both no longer playing. That's the thing about Jord, he'll randomly up and do a 180 all in two weeks. "Hey, I put my my account up for sale last night, someone's buying it," was literally how it happened, in one day. Then he gets a job, starts a new obsession with beer brewing and thats it, no more depressing slump. I guess I knew it would happen that way, and there was nothing I could or his parents could say to get him to do it. Either way he's going through with withdrawals of course, still checking WoW related websites, and forums. He claims he's doing it less and less though. Happy B-day today to him by the way. As for me, well everytime one quits it does get easier. Totally words of an addict, but really I only had issues until I filled my time up with other crap, like actually putting hours in for work, reading What Am I Doing Here? by Bruce Chatwin and what not.

Topic 3. Swinger Dates
I'm not one for talking about my "sex" life. Okay wait thats a lie, I do freely, if the opportunity presents its self. I guess I mean I've never posted about it? Either way all I want to say, is the most surpising people participate in the "swinger life-style" don't even under estimate what a person does in their personal lives! There are more then you think.

Topic 4. The quandries of Red Hair Dye.
After not dying my hair for months, I did. How is it I have no self restraint in that department. I could get brain cancer from this stuff! Plus dying ones hair red can appear to be a cry for attention, I've passed that judgement even. And here I am with red hair again. Now my already split ends are like WTF, and the healthy few inches of dark dark brown hair is pretty much in shock.

Topic 5. Resumes Can Walk Off a Cliff.
I'm working on my resume. I need another part time job, because frankly paying $80 for an ear lavage due to lack of health insurance, waiting around for my boss to call and give me hours, add not saving is getting ridiculous. Especially now that Jordan's gotten his life together, the pressure is on. Should be great fun this job hunting in the worst economy ever...but alas it all starts with the resume, which I hate. I don't know how to brag and how to not sound redundant while I'm doing it!

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I'm going to write about my current obsession with entering to win the HGTV Dream Home, but the more I think about it, the more ridiculous the obsession seems. Of course I knew it was ridiculous to begin with. Besides the fact that I'll never get randomly chosen, (and even if I did they could reject me upon researching my background and discovering I'm un-married and don't have 2.5 kids), paying the taxes off to keep the damn thing and its contents is impossible. I start up my computer, check my emails, and then go right to HGTV.com to enter myself in the sweepstakes everyday. Then if the mood is right, and I'm willing to dream, I'll shuffle through some of the pictures, imagine myself cooking in the double island kitchen, or taking a bath in the "slipper tub", or selling the 'kids room' furniture on ebay.

Last night I shouted downstairs to Jordan, "dude I don't know what is wrong with me, I want this house, but I have no interest in being a matron, which clearly the winner is supposed to be". He replied probably not looking away from the football, "well you've got the nagging part down". So much support, at least he's not playing WoW.

I recently checked out what previous HGTV homes looked like, and this years is by far the best. I think I'm attracted to it, because its old victorian style, and that appeals to my Humboldt heart ache. Although I've forgotten all the names, I studied this architecture in my Settlement Geography class, and feel somehow connected? I also like most every room in the house, minus a few chairs and lamps which could easily be removed. It's in Sonoma, the visions I have of are of golden light setting blaze to fall colored grape vines, which frankly isn't bad at all. It's not as remote as Humboldt, still close enough to the real world, to be associated with my fond memories of NorCal.

The interesting thing is that I know if I were ever in the position to aquire a home, the normal-non sweepstakes way, I would never think of purchasing a huge house like this. It doesn't appeal to me to own a house I don't use every room for, waste the energy to heat it, clean it, blah blah blah. I quite content with the idea of getting an apartment, I'm not tied down to. But I know I want a useable kitchen, but I think the small appliances, pots, pans and a damn good Santoku knife make your kitchen.

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Although I’m enjoying this winter heat wave, I’m trying to be cautious too, because it is just a fake out. Soon enough the clouds will roll back, the marine layer will descend upon the Westside and smother us in cold winter fog.

At the park Beck likes to sit as close to me as he possibly can, even if it means on top of me. He flops around for a while, sniffing some struggling grassy knot, or shyly sniffs another dogs ass, but in the end he’s lazy, and timid from his childhood. His fat rolls back and forth across his body as he lopes over to me on aged failing hips, plops down and then surveys the scene trying to look regal.

I lie back on the filthy grass, stare up into the blue, and enjoy the sun licking my translucent skin (yes translucent, its transcending white). I can hear planes taking off at LAX, roaring off the ground some how, taking people somewhere. I’m thinking about all the things that are positive in my life, I’ve got a lot to look forward to, a lot to get ready for, a lot to change.

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