Brains!

August 5, 2005

I just finished reading The Magicians Nephew and the Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe from the Chronicles of Narnia series in less then ten hours. They are releasing the movie versions this winter and I wanted to have read them before hand. Why oh why did I not read them when I was younger. Yet at the same time I think I know why, I would have become frustrated with them, as I did so many times now until I reminded myself they are supposed to be like one giant old fairy tale. Real fairy tales, the way they are supposed to be. Like the Grimm’s, or Anderson. Then I didn’t mind so much, and I sent my thanks to Mr. Blatz once again for his Mythology and Folktales class my senior year of high school. I appreciated a lot of the major themes and characters more because they are so classical. Also the similarities between Tolkien and Lewis are incredibly close, and no wonder, the crazy men were in a damn writing club for so many years it only makes sense.

Since being here allows for so much spare time we always have either the radio playing or some CD playing filling the quiet empty space with something other then our occasional laugh at how funny sitting in an empty apartment reading Harry Potter and Narnia is. Not having a car will prove to be a difficult and limiting thing. Anyways back to the point. I realize now that all these song’s lyric make so much sense once you’ve experienced what they are singing about for yourself. Why did I ever think they were sappy and silly and so beyond reality when I was younger? Because now I realize they are all true. Incubus’s “Wish you were here”, Al Green “Let’s Stay together”, 10,000 Miles by Mary Chapin.

August 6, 2005

I think it’s happening again. Like last time. But I think I’m safer now, it’s safer to do now. I’m letting myself out completely again. I think I might have been doing this all along in this relationship and I just didn’t know it. Ever since what last year? Anway I have said many times before when I begin to love something or I begin to open up completely I tend to be quite passionate and let it all out, no holding back. This means complete honesty and effort on my part, and it comes so naturally for me to do that, there is hardly anything holding me back. And since I feel like I have let myself out so completely with this person especially recently its proof of complete comfort and complete love. And now I think its more mutual then other past experiences. So in that way its safer. I have more to say about this eventually.

So I picked up Sue Monks Kidd’s The Secret Life of Bees again. I like reading things a second time through, reminds you of why you loved it so much in the first place.
“ …And wondered how he could stand me. In one short morning I had exhibited insane laughter, hidden lust, pissy behavior, self-pity and hysterical crying. If I’d been trying to show him my worst sides, I could not have done a better job than this.”
“Otis pressed his forehead to the heart, standing there the longest of them all, head to heart, like he was filling up his empty tank.”
“I have noticed that if you look carefully at people’s eyes the fist five seconds they look at you, the truth of their feelings will shine through just for an insant before it flickers away.”
“That’s because May takes in things differently than the rest of us do…when you and I hear about some misery out there, it might make us feel bad for a while, but it doesn’t wreck our whole world. It’s like we have a built-in protection around our hearts that keeps the pain from overwhelming us. But May-she doesn’t have that. Everything just comes into her-all the suffering out there-and she feels as if it’s happening to her.”
“Did you know that there are thirty-two names for love in one of the Eskimo languages? And we just have this one. We are so limited, you have to use the same word for loving Rosaleen as you do for loving a Coke with peanuts. Isn’t that a shame we don’t have more ways to say it?”
“Have you ever written a letter you knew you could never mail but you needed to write it anyway?”