Brains!

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My blog could be considered a dangerous thing. I don't think it is. Everything I write is completely honest. Some posts are commentary, some posts are stories, some are boring, some are fun. Most often it's a window into the part of my subconscious that cannot be communicated verbally. It's meant to be the place I spill, organize and store my abstract hidden things. You can really access a lot about me through the blog, and it's partially there for that purpose. To find out the things I cannot say, and don't necessarily need to be said. But its also a tool for me, the process of writing/blogging is therapy in some sense. However, there's a lot missing. To read it, and to think that it is all of me, would be very wrong. That's why it can be misleading. A lot of people read it, and they misinterpret. No one really knows what I actually mean by a lot of the things I say, and that's not my problem. Like I said, its only there partially for the purpose of letting people into that part of me, the rest is there for me, for my subconscious to come out. To take it literally would be a dangerous thing for the reader.

Important Pieces

In that space where infinity above meets immensity below we see the first sign of a new dawn. Dark always gives way to light; for a brief moment nothing is forbidden, everything is possible. But what would we do if the light never came? Maybe we would lie down. Maybe we could go back to sleep. Maybe we could wake up. - Adbusters

The minute I heard my first love story I started looking for you, not knowing how blind that was. Lovers don’t finally meet somewhere; they’re in each other all along. - Jelaluddin Rumi (1207-1273)

Adopt the pace of nature: Her secret is patience. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

"The poet Rilke was afraid that if he got rid of his demons, he would lose his angels as well. Of course the danger of clinging to our demons to save our angels is that our demons may well take over." - Tim Farrington

Amnesia is not knowing who one is and wanting desperately to find out. Euphoria is not knowing who one is and not caring. Ecstasy is knowing exactly who one is-and still not caring.
- Tom Robbins

I've never had this feeling before. I mean I've had times where I didn't feel like I was really walking around, times I felt like it wasn't me and I was watching TV or something. My brain had that whole "someone else do the thinking for you" thing. But this is different, I actually feel like I cant tell if I am awake or not. Maybe when it settles in I'll realize I'm awake, this is all real he's there looking at me and making me laugh. Right now I feel like when I walk home he wont be there that I was asleep the entire time. I don't feel quite to aware as I normally do and I wonder why that is. Maybe I just need to do something really physically rigorous to wake my body up and translate the energy to my mind. He says he feels the same way though. I know I'm happy, there's nothing I am worried about its just I am in a complete state of shock. I had been waiting so long that I just became used to the waiting. And now that I don't have to anymore, and that place of waiting is empty, I have to wait for something to settle in there and make me believe. Maybe when I get used to him being here with me all the time it will settle in...We shall see....

This Blog

Important Pieces

Thursday, October 6, 2005

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