Brains!

I can't sleep and I know why.
My teeth keep clenching together and strangely I can breathe through my nose, or maybe not so strange. I guess on relaxed nights my mouth turns slack jaw and lazy, breathing heavy and deep. My nose only allows for short shallow breathes. I relish the comfort of my pillow, and the warmth of my sheets. But tonight I feel strangled, yet alone, empty even, on more levels then one.
I keep running over what I am supposed to know, what I have been told in my head, trying desperately to make it stick. Grasping for sanity and contentedness, which probably will never be gained.
I almost feel like this lifestyle has past by, before only a year or two ago, I don't know what it means now, or where it will take me now.
I wonder a lot what is going to happen. In the world, in America, in my life...it seems to be just around the corner, something.