Brains!

I've been thinking and researching this whole weekend about what I want to do. What I've enjoyed doing.

archivist/librarian/historical preservation/geography Believe it or not, it's recommended that you get a masters degree in information sciences to be a librarian or archivist. This of course means a couple years of building up an application, not to mention scoring high on the GRE to make up for my GPA. And years of debt. All can be done. Interestingly enough UT Austin offers many of these degrees, and many of the UCs do too. I also discovered that there are a lot of online schools I'd likely have a better chance of getting into, and I could go at my own pace while supporting myself from anywhere. OR I could totally start something completely new. Clearly I'm good at repeating generalized processing. Which is what I've been doing so successfully at KCC. I care about the environment, what could I do with that? OR I could write. Be a poor writer. But I've always thought that I should have a real job, and write for pleasure.

Maybe I don't need a therapist, maybe I need a career counselor.

I never really considered searching for a real career. I guess I just thought it would find me eventually. Again with the 'waiting'. Instead of pursuing, I just expected shit to happen. And maybe in another economy I could have gotten away with that. I always think that avoiding the hard work, that filling my life with outside activities was really the important thing. But I wonder if I could have both. Maybe I just avoided the hard work and years of debt, because I was lazy. But I think it's because I was scared of failing, and once I got those degrees, would I even be any good at the job? Because I thought those things, I avoided my feelings on this matter. But now I'm not avoiding anything, I just feel lost. I hope the book I ordered helps.

I biked to the beach today and thought of two activities I'd like to try. Fishing and sailing. I actually took classes in both years ago. But I'd like to try them. I dunno they have the same appeal that bowling does, for some reason.

I wrote a rough draft about Teenagers, for the Sun submission. I need to find a peer writing group. I even started looking for writing classes at SMC or WestLA. Of course the semester already started. Boo.