Brains!

Heart break doesn't kill you.

It just slows you down, makes you forget yourself, floods you with poison that destroys you slowly, but it goes away. Time is all I need. I don't apologize for being so emotional. There are a lot of things going on in me. And this is the first time I've had my heart broken, it probably won't be the last, but firsts are always hard. I've never suffered a great loss like this, no deaths in the family, nothing really emotionally intense. Breaking up with James was nothing like this, because it was me doing it. I was in Jordan's place, knowing this was for the best, and I could never ask James to be who he wasn't.

My blog is the only place I can really explode all my emotions, without overloading the people closest to me. It makes me feel like I'm putting everything out there, instead of bottling it up inside of me. It helps me heal. And I'm healing...I will be healing for a while. There are just very dark moments I'm going through right now. I'll swing back around to having hope and faith, but this time in myself more and what I can do.