Brains!

Yesterday...some bad news at work, definitely cracked my semi-stable peace I've gained. I went to pieces of course, and this time the feelings were older than all of this...years older. I went to the bathroom, to calm down. I knew my feelings were being exacerbated not only by recent events, but also because of hormones. I grew angry in that stall, thoughts jumped around in my head,'if he hadn't fucking done this I'd be in Austin'. Then I realized, sheesh, nothing that's going to happen to me can be half as bad as what I just went through. I mean unless like I get cancer or something. But nothing that happens to regular people on a day to day basis, can be half as bad. It's like I'm absolved of fear. It has nothing to do with whether or not I went to Austin, or didn't, no one elses fault but mine. I calmed down instantly. Just take things as they come, there's no reason to go to pieces when something goes poorly. Remember all the amazing things you do have, the things you could have, the people in your life, I hit the bottom, I know what it's like. I felt really proud of myself, really hopeful that I'm getting better day by day.